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Another Brick In The Wall

Olympic fever is catching on. In a matter of minutes the official torch will be lit. I'm a little upset I didn't make some plans to head to Vancouver for these events. I am a bigger fan of the Winter Olympics, plus I have a good number of friends up there that I would love to hang out with again.

And while I will not be physically be there to watch the events, my face will be looking down over Vancouver during the games. How is that you ask? Have I developed that top secret satellite I have been working on? No, not yet. But my face is one of over 13,000 on the Molson 2010 Mural. A wall of faces that help celebrate the spirit of the Olympics.

My face has coordinates 50,8 on the big wall, if you want to look it up.
While it is not as cool as being on a wall at the Elsinore brewery, it is still an honor to be one of the many.

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Posted by Ryan at 18:47
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You Better Listen To The Radio

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to attend a live taping of Whad'Ya Know, a comedy and quiz radio show. As a fan of the show, it was interesting to see how the show works, as well as to put faces to the voices I have listened to for years. But the best part was being selected from the audience to take part in the quiz. Sure, it meant that I was made fun of a little, including a short discussion about how I lack a middle name, but hey, I got the chance to go for the Mother Lode of prizes.

Thanks to the power of the internet, you can listen to the show, if you failed to catch it live. Download the June 13, 2009 episode or listen online if you prefer. I can be heard during the last fifteen minutes of the show, if you don't want to listen to the whole show. Enjoy.

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Posted by Ryan at 11:45
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Until I Hear It From You

The Bloomington Extreme, one of the local indoor football teams, is having a promotion tonight that I was very tempting, or at least interesting. After tonight's game there is a free concert by Remedy Drive, a Christian rock band from Omaha, Nebraska.

But the odd thing is that is also Deaf Night for the Bloomington Extreme. I find some humor in the fact that a band has been booked to play the same evening they are having a outreach towards the deaf population. Don't get me wrong, I think both are great promotions. I wonder if it would be better to separate the events.

Can you imagine the band members discuss the concert on the ride to the hotel? "Man, a large part of the crowd just did not appear to be into what we were singing. Like when I told them to put their hands together, they just stood there." I guess at least they won't get too many complaints of being too loud.

Here is a snapshot of their promotional schedule, to prove I am not making this up.

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Posted by Ryan at 18:44
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I'm Already Torn

Unemployment has a few perks. Tax forms are easier to fill out, your lunch break is not limited to a half hour, and it give a person time to work on his break dancing moves. Some of my time has been spent filling out applications online, although I can easily be distracted. Hey look shiny things!

Two sites I have stumbled across lately have instantly found a spot in my bookmark folder. The first site is Sexy People. It is a collection of classic Olan Mills style photographs. Here is one of my favorites from their collection.

The other site is called Pets Who Want To Kill Themselves. Forget all the cute pet photos. At PWWTKT you will find some of the more depressing, yet hilarious, pet photos. Call it animal cruelty, call it pure comedy, either way it is worth a visit. While this is one of my favorites, you will need to find the one involving a World's Best Dad shirt for an extra laugh.

I am not sure which one site I like more, perhaps you can decide for me.

Currently listening to: Snow Patrol -

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Posted by Ryan at 21:34
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Know It's Only Words

Sometimes I am amazed at the things people announce to the world. A few months ago I posted about the lady at the Grand Canyon who couldn't wait to see what her photos would look like on the computer. I honestly thought it would be a while before I had something as golden to pass along.

Well, tonight it happened again. I overheard another phrase that made me wonder if there are too many chemicals in the foods we consume. This evening I had a ticket to see Spamalot. As a fan of both Monty Python and tolerator of musical theater, I figured I was in for a good time. I was not disappointed. It is a funny show, so funny I think the guy a couple seats over laughed to the point of wetting one's self. But the line that made me laugh the most was not from the show, but the couple behind me. At intermission, one turned to the other and said,

"I did not know this was a comedy"

Think about this for a second. A couple paid money for seats to a musical written by a comedian based on a comedic movie that he and other members of his very famous comedy troupe wrote and stared in. Even the title sounds humorous. Spamalot! Or were they expecting a sad tale about someone's email inbox and while they did find cheap drugs, ways to increase their size, and helped a widow transfer her late husband's great fortune out of the country that killed him, they could never find true love?

And if that wasn't bad enough, I heard a similar sentiment from someone else near me as well. This made me wonder if these people have extra money laying around and will go to see anything playing at the local civic center. Is it that hard to use the Google to find out if Spamalot is a comedy? But most of all, did they need to announce to the people in the cheap seats that they probably should have stayed home and watched American Idol? Really people, sometimes it is best to not verbalize all your thoughts. But I guess I have to thank those who do give me a good laugh once in a while with their clueless comments. So there you go.

Currently listening to:

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Posted by Ryan at 00:09
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Sailing Takes Me Away

The crew has informed me that if I do any of the following that I better hope that my God better be willing to do that fish thing again.

1. Play that blasted Gordon Lightfoot Shipwreck song one more time.
2. Stand on the front of the deck and scream, "I'm king of the world!" again.
3. Ask to watch Speed 2

Just joking. And I really am not posting from the boat, I just used the scheduled post feature of Blogger.

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Posted by Ryan at 11:54
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Sister Christian The Time Has Come

I can now officially leave this country, even this continent. No it is not because the school no longer employs me. It has nothing to do with the fact my passport has been filled with enough Asian stamps. It all has to do with a simple photo that was taken yesterday on the Seoul subway system. Yep, I have acquired my photo with a group of Korean nuns. This will join my photo of me and the Italian nuns in my little collection of "me and the nuns" photos. And do not forget the classic, "Drinking Beer With A Nun" photo.

Currently listening to: Martyn Joseph -

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Posted by Ryan at 09:54
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For I Haven't Got A Clue

A couple days ago, my brother sent me a link to a YouTube video. He just mentioned it hinted that it was Lionel Richie, but said nothing more. Immediately, I skipped on to my next email not wanting to bother with the link. During some spare time today, I decided to click the link so I could at least delete the email. What I discovered was a clip from one of my favorite foreign television shows. No, it wasn't from "Talk with the Beauties," one of favorite Korean shows. It was "Wetten Das?" my favorite show from my time in Germany. I loved the mix of celebrity interviews, stupid stunts, and musical performances. This clip mixes all three of those elements together for something I could watch over and over. Enjoy.

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Posted by Ryan at 11:27
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Sweet Comic Valentine

A belated happy Valentine's Day to you all. You got to love a day celebrating the patron saint of love and the plague. Oh, and bee keepers, St. Valentine is the patron saint of bee keepers. So why do we give flowers and not honey on this glorious day? Sure bees travel from flower to flower, but the honey is where it is at. I guess as long as society does not start celebrating with the giving of disease ridden rats, we will all be fine.

Speaking of odd things Valentine related, Law And Order: SVU Valentine's Day cards might be one of the worst ideas. A show revolving around sex crimes is not the best idea for expressing your love.

By the way, here in Korea they show LaO:SVU is on two different channels. You can actually see three or four episodes a day.

Currently listening to:

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Posted by Ryan at 23:45
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I Love My Radio

My external hard drive decided to quit last night. Sadly this housed most of my music collection. Due to my frustration, I haven't attempted to fix it. Yet, I still need me some music to listen to. So I decided to try the "Ryancordell's Neighbourhood" station at Last.fm. It takes all the music I have listened to, and mixes a station based around the information gathered. So far, I am impressed, and thinking that I have found my office station. Take it for a test drive, I think you might like it. (That is if you have an eclectic taste in music mixed with a strong dislike of most music labeled "Top 40")

And yes, I think it is cool to have a RyanCordell's Neighbourhood. Now if you would excuse me, I must change my shoes. Oh, I think I hear a trolley.

And now for something completely different, This makes me laugh

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Posted by Ryan at 11:31
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Party On The Positive Side

A couple weeks ago, I had the displeasure of flying on Northwest Airlines. While I might tell more about that later, I will go on record saying I found my overall experience on Uzbekistan Airways last year far superior than any I have had with NWA (with I think stands for Numbskulls With Airplanes).

As we were preparing to disembark at the Incheon, Airport, one of the flight attendants paged one of the passengers on the flight. As she did she stuttered and messed up a little, or at least appeared to, and thus this is what the announcement and following comments sounded like:

Flight Attendant: Would passenger Marky Mark (mumble mumble) please contact...
Me: Wow, I thought I saw a funky bunch on the plane, but didn't know their leader was with them.
Other Passenger: So that wasn't some bad turbulence we hit, it was just "Good Vibrations."

And that my friends was the best part of the NWA experience.

Currently listening to: Marky Mark And the Funky Bunch - "Good Vibrations"

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Posted by Ryan at 00:25
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Last Night At The County Fair

Anne Murray sang, "How I wanna hear the anchor man talk about a county fair." Well, I hope I can help make Anne's dreams come true. Here are a couple commercials that aired last week in Kansas. They were recorded at one of the stops on the road trip.

Unfortunately the fair has past, but the commercials will remain in our hearts, not to mention stuck in our heads.

Currently listening to:

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Posted by Ryan at 02:06
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I Could Solve Some Mysteries Too

It started as a joke. While riding around in Bangalore, I had noticed mustaches on many billboards and posters, as well as in real life. So I turned to one of the other leaders and said we should name March the Mustache Month. We would encourage all to join us in growing them. It would be a celebration. And I am pretty sure I wasn't serious about the concept.

But then we came across what could be one of the coolest 'staches I have personally seen.
The momentum of that mustache was monstrous, and the joke became a reality. Thus, we have declared March Mustache Celebration Month. So if you can grow it, show it! I was shocked and comforted to find out that we were not alone.

I leave you with a photo of three cool guys sporting mustaches for inspiration for your own. So join us in the celebration!

Currently listening to: Hall & Oates -

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Posted by Ryan at 02:04
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Dare To Be Stupid

I did not get a minor in camping in college just to impress the ladies. No, I'm a big fan of summer camps and the impact on youth that they can have. And in my years of working at camps on three different continents, I have worked with some pretty amazing people. Although I have to admit, many of them are also slightly crazy.

Take for example this summer. After snack time there remained a large bowl full of liquid waste. It contained ramen, Oreo cereal, fruit loops, and various sodas that the young campers could not finish. Someone suggested that one of the staff stick their head in it for some cash. Before we knew it, a joke was becoming a reality.

Now you the home viewer can enjoy this brief moment in my summer, thanks to Google Video and Sweatshop.

Currently listening to: Beck -

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Posted by Ryan at 10:56
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Ever Searching For The One

I decided to check the logs of my site today to see how people are finding me. It always amazes me what people enter into Google or Yahoo that leads them here. Here are a few of my favorites of the last few months' searches. My snarky responses in italics.

1. Sell Your Girlfriend - Try eBay.
2. Debbie Gibson haiku - Two of my loves together in one search.
3. Little boy dancing to shake it like a polaroid video - I got nothin'.
4. Peanut butter butts - Is this one of the Reece's snacks?
5. Oops I peed - and you are typing this why?
6. "Give me a shot in the butt" - Sometimes I think that is what we are all looking for.
7. Cordell hoax - Exposing this hoax is the plot of the next Dan Brown book.
8. How to mummify someone - Information to keep on file. You never know when you might need to perserve a friend.
9. Johnathan lipnicki wears underwear - Who searches for this? And does the FBI know?
10. Do british pigs perspire - This question has kept me up nights since I read it.
11. Best way to say "be my girlfriend" - You're asking the wrong guy...

How did you get here?

Currently listening to: David Mead -

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Posted by Ryan at 07:28
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Dancing On The Valentine

Two years ago I tossed out a Valentine's Day Song I help write with a couple guys, including a member of the Battle Creek Crunch. This year, I give you a really bad poem with extra cheese. Enjoy!

It is February 14th which is Valentine's Day,
One of the celebrations I wish would go away.
It is not that I'm too cheap to buy a bouquet,
But if you ask two of my ex-girlfriends to say
They would tell you around this holiday I sent them on their way
As the relationships had gone into some form of dismay.
I am sorry to say I used the "lets be friends" cliche.
Have I told when I got in trouble for yelling, "I'm not gay?"

Now don't get me wrong, for some girl to love I do pray
I hope I find her before my hair starts to turn gray.
Even if it all falls out I'll never wear a toupee.
To find her must I travel to the city of Bombay,
Should I make another trip over the Strait of Calais?
At this point I don't care if she is from Green Bay.
When we are together all will be right under the Milky Way
That is as long as she doesn't make me take up ballet
And bore me instructing me in the ways of Piaget
If she is lucky she can ride with me to see Coldplay
Or stay home and watch the Office with Ricky Gervais.

BTW, if you know a nice girl who will not betray
Tell her to fill out this form, okay?

Currently listening to: The Kelly Family -

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Posted by Ryan at 21:39
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